morning, Bob came banging on the trailer door with a good
sized orangutan. We had just finished breakfast and were
watching the boob tube. I got up, went to the door and Bob
said, "How about holding Asshole while I pull his tooth?" I
stepped out, followed by May in her cooloffs.
Bob said not to worry, that he wouldn't bite. Well, it took
all that I could do to hold this guy, Finally, I got a
scissor lock around his hips and a headlock under his arms
and behind his neck. It took both of Bob's hands to open his
mouth. He told May to get the pair of pliers from his back
pocket and pull the tooth.
It was a front baby tooth, about to come out anyway, so May
took the pliers and pulled it out. When I turned him loose,
he walked over to May and slapped at her. May backed off and
he came to me and started butting me with his head.
I had my shirt off at the time. When he stopped butting me,
he started looking me over for bugs. I had a flesh wart on
my back and he pulled it off. Bob got ahold of his hand and
pulled him away, while May put a band-aid on it.
May sat down on the ground and we all three watched the
orangutan. He pulled some of the excess equipment from under
our trailer, picked up a sledge hammer and started banging
it on the ground. Bob stated, "That's why they call the
orangutan the carpenters of the jungle."
Well, this orangutan started banging on the tires, then he
banged the side of the trailer. Bob hollered at him and he
dropped the hammer. He then went over to May, pulled back
the top of her cooloffs, reached in and started feeling one
of her boobs. She pulled his hand out and slapped it and
said, "Bad boy."
From there, he started pecking at her legs, then at her
thighs and then he put his hand up the bottom of her
cooloffs. We had left him alone up to that point, just to
see what he would do.
May wacked him up the side of his noggin, saying "That's a
no-no!" We all started laughing. Then the orangutan stood
up, took her by the hand and pulled her up off the ground
and started to lead her to the wooded area out back. Then we
really cracked up.
A few minutes later, Bob's wife walked in saying, "Did you
guys get his tooth pulled?" Bob said, "Yeah, here it is,"
and he showed it to her saying "May pulled it while Fats and
I held him down." She turned to me and asked me how I was
doing this fine sunny morning.
I said, "All right, 'til Bob brought this crazy 'rang over
here. He wounded me, almost caused me to bleed to death,
pulled all the excess shit out from under the trailer and
then to top that, he tried to rape my wife! How's that for
starters, this fine sunny day?"
explained what happened to her, she cracked up, too.
Well, by the end of
the season, Lou's wife died. He sold the carny, retired and
bought a piece of land and a double wide mobile home in
To be Continued