The Monkey Boy
My whole life, I've enjoyed visiting
sideshows at the state and county fairs, even the ripoff shows. I used to
go to see how badly they were done, and get mad because I thought I had been
ripped-off. Now, I go and laugh about how badly I'm getting ripped-off.
But, I'm still amazed by that damn giant cow. How do they do that?
I've see them all -- monkey boy, snake girl, gorilla girl, tall woman, short
woman. When I was young I went to see Gorilla Girl and explained to my
friends that it's just mirrors, and it's not a real gorilla. I now regret
that so the last time I went a few years ago I tried to see how worked up I
could some teenage girls by acting nervous. When the gorilla jumped out, I
screamed and ran out the door with a pack of truly terrified girls right behind
me. What a kick!
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Once while
visiting the Monkey Boy "exhibit", Mr. Monkey Boy motioned
for me to come closer. He stopped grunting and
whispered, "Hey, can I get a cigarette?" I gave him a smoke,
but I warned him about the dangers of smoking. I'll
bet Monkey Boy picked up that habit in one of those damn
government testing labs. Damn them all for addicting
poor Monkey Boy!
They no longer
have shows like Harvey's at the NC State fair. I don't
know about my home town of Wilson. Harvey's show was
always there, and I don't know if any other show took his
place. I consider shows like his to be the "real"
sideshow. I think Snake Girl and the others are about
all that is left around here, but they are a poor substitute
for legends like the Human Blockhead, the Human Pincussion,
and Static Electricity Guy. Oh sure, you can walk down the
midway now and see Big Butt Girl and Smells Like Garlic Man,
but they work at the coin toss game.
-Bryan Bass
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