You Want to Bullfight?
by Jim Rose
are some rules for this deathly feat of animal cruelty. If you
ever thought of becoming a matador, I hope these realities
dissuade you. In Spain, anybody can visit private ranches that
raise fighting bulls and learn how to face them. In these
amateur arenas heifers are used in place of bulls, and there
are no killings, but this prepares you for the next level and
teaches you graceful bravery skills.
These hints won’t make you a
professional matador, but if you’ve ever been interested in
the subject, this should help.
While learning and
practicing, the points of the horns should be filed or sawed
Use the small cape
(called ”muleta”). It is a piece of flannel attached to a
two-foot wooden stick that serves as a handle.
All bulls do not
like running into walls because in their life experience they
have found that it hurts.
Walk parallel to the heifer
with the cape wide open, and keep your back to the wall. When
you’re fifteen feet away from the animal, shake the cape and
shout “Hey bull.” His reaction will be to charge. Face the
animal and have the cape extended in his path. Do not move!
The color and size of the cape will attract the heifer. While
he’s charging, don’t do anything that will distract him
from the cloth. Once the animal goes through it, don’t just
stand there, but be prepared for the second charge. Move three
or four steps back to
give you more room in case of a
If he’s slow and is just
looking around, you can provoke a charge by moving a step
towards the center of the ring shaking the cape.
You gain points with style and
Repeat this act a few more
times, then retire to the safety of the protective barriers.
Now you see how hard it is to
kill a cow. I hope you’ve lost interest. Olé!