Candy Butcher Jackpot

Lee Kolozsy

 

This Gadjo climbs down from the blues and walks up to me carrying a tray full of floss and I knew right that minute here comes a jackpot…

I was costumed in full Circus Ringmaster regalia and this must have given him the idea that I was in charge…

 

He told me in a somewhat exasperated tone that one of our candy butchers had left the tray with him when he was trying to buy some floss for his three kids, turns out he handed the local boy we had conscripted from the previous town a double sawbuck and the kid said "Hold this tray, I'll be right back with your change"…

 

That was the last we ever saw of the kid…

 

I had an announcement coming up, and I needed to square this beef and had no scratch on me, you know, the show must go on…

 

I took a quick count and it seemed like there was two dozen sticks of floss in the tray and I had nothing to lose so I made my pitch…

 

Listen neighbor, we do this all for the kids and I'm sorry this went out of control, but I think we can solve it if we work together. Why don't you hold on to the tray and go give your wife and kids each a cotton candy on the house, then go around the seats and peddle the remainder for two bucks each, take out the twenty you're missing, and return the tray to the concession stand…

 

With that I took the ring only about a heartbeat behind my cue…

 

I never saw the guy again, but the girls in the floss joint asked me after the show if the new guy was coming with us, they said he turned in like a champ and moved a half dozen trays. Turns out when he turned in the first tray after our new boy skipped out with his dub, the girls handed him another tray, and after looking confused for a minute or so, he jumped right in…

 

Why the hell didn't he stay for the next show and play out the spot, bless his show bum heart...

 


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